I am a very lucky man – I’ve got an amazing wife and am the father to three wonderful kids. Lylli was born on Halloween in 2008, Gracie was born November 2010 and although she only lived for 17 months, she will remain as much a part of this family as the rest of us, and Mickey Gray, our first son, was born in June of 2012. I’m not going to say that life has gone exactly as I would have wanted, but it is a good life and I am determined to make the best of it.

This blog is an attempt to document my quest to become a dad that my family can be proud of.

Friday, October 8, 2010

Hospital Tours

We took a tour of Abbott Northwestern Hospital's birth center yesterday followed by a meeting with a neonatologist and a tour of the NICU at The Children's Hospital.  They tell us that we are in the right place for our scenario.  That is about the only thing from yesterday's tour that I can hang my hat on.  Everybody there was extremely nice, but it quickly became very obvious that we are in for a very confusing and scary ride.  Gracie's situation is very serious – She will be delivered in a very institutional like birthing center – a team of 4 people, highly trained in resuscitating  babies,  will be in the attached room next door.  She will then be rushed to the NICU at Children's.  I will go with her.  Unfortunately Carrie is then left by herself until she is moved to her actual hospital room.  I was very upset to find out that she will not have any time to be with Carrie before being moved.  I know this is very important to her and could tell when she heard the news that it was very difficult for her to hear as well.    As soon as Carrie is recovered enough to join me in the NICU at Children's, she will.  Once in the NICU, she will be administered a drug to keep her heart pumping the way it did in utero (the ride side doing the work).   This will give a large team of cardiologists some time to closer examine Gracie and meet as a team to decide what can be done.  Once Gracie is stabilized, Lylli will be given 15 minutes to meet her little sister – it just breaks my heart to know that while Gracie is in the NICU, that 15 minutes is the only time Lylli will get to see her.   I am obviously very concerned about Gracie, but am also very protective and worried about Lylli during this time.   Lylli is my world, and the thought of her missing her mommy or daddy while being shuffled around from relative to relative is too much for me to handle.  Between Gracie in the hospital, time with Lylli, taking care of our dogs, not to mention the fact that I am still a consultant and still need to maintain relatively normal business hours at the office, this time is going to truly test our ability to multitask and manage all of the logistics that come with it.  We are less than 50 days from her due date – I know nobody ever really knows what the future holds, but in this case, we really don't know – all that we can do is remember  that she has already beaten the odds and  pray that she continues to be the fighter that she has been thus far.  If I could trade places with either one of them, Carrie or Gracie, I would.  I'm pretty sure we are very prepared to raise a child with Down syndrome, I just pray that everything works out and we are given that chance. 

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